Monday, April 25, 2011

Easter Sunday...

Two neighboring states had a mandatory shut down of their liquor store/sales. We knew about the one state but were very surprised about the other one being dry. We were open regular hours, we are open everyday for 13 hours, 7 days a week and only are closed on Christmas day. So needless to say we were insanely busy yesterday.

I ran reggy 2 for 8 hours. On an average Sunday at reggy 2 I will get an approx 30 credit card slips, but on this holiday Sunday I got about 260 credit card slips. But people are crazy, they will travel up to 30 miles for alcohol and buy 2 beers twice in one day.

This one guy complained that our 5 cent cups because they cost.. 5 cents, even after being told "We paid for them, they aren't free." he said "Those should be free, it's like buying cigarettes and not getting a free pack of matches." I replied "Well it's illegal to drink and drive, so really you shouldn't need a cup and just wait till you get home. We don't support drinking and driving." With that being said he gave me the 5 cents.

I set up the answering machine to say "Yes we are open!" and stating the hours and a "drive safe, Happy Easter" message. We don't have to answer the phone all day, it's great. The main reason people call us is to find out if we are open on these major holidays. This also solves answering dumb ass questions to people that aren't even in the store. I hate it when people call to ask "How much is your Captain Morgan?", why don't you come in and find out. And I really hate Lottery Fucks calling asking "What where the numbers tonight?" I don't care, they should look it up online or call the lottery it's self.

Saturday, April 23, 2011

May I see your I.D.?

It's my job, it's the law, duh. If you do not look like you are 30 or over I am going to card you. Some people find it very annoying that I ask. I notice the younger they are the more annoyed they get. I really don't care that you are annoyed, it's not worth the fine I and the store would have pay, or losing my job, or getting the store shut down, all because you felt annoyed I was doing my job.

Younger people well roll their eyes and say "Ugh I'm still gettin carded!" and when I look at their age they are only 22. Which I reply by saying "Because you are 22...that's young."

I'm not very good with faces and I don't really care to get to know people so I will card the same person 3 times within the same day and not even notice. Unless you have a tattoo on your face or something awful like that I won't remember you, so bring your ID with you every time. I wait on 100's of people within an 8 hour shift. It would be different if I only waited on you all day long, but sadly I don't. So don't give me "I WAS JUST IN HERE!" cry, what did you lose your id already? Did you have to give your id back to the person who it belonged to? All I know is you are trying to buy something that has an age limit so prove yourself to me.

If you do throw a fit such as yell "I'M 21, I LIVE RIGHT DOWN THE STREET AND COME HERE ALL THE TIME, STOP CARDED ME ALL THE TIME, I'M SICK OF IT!!" So after your fit you hand me your id which says you are 21 and 2 weeks old, I'll say "lol, you come in here all the time? What for the last 2 weeks?" With a rotten attitude like that I try to remember to always card that person. Once a kid finally caught on and he apologized for his rude behavior a month later.

People that go to a liquor store without an id, wtf really? There are too many of you, why do you even bother? You don't look 30-something, you knew what type of purchase you wanted to make, so why'd you even bother opening our door? Get out and don't hang in the parking lot and ask other customers to buy you stuff. I will tell you to leave the parking lot, if you refuse I call the cops without letting you know. If you have a friend with you who is over 21 and has their id on them get them to make the purchase to begin with. Don't be an idiot and waste my time.

If you have a fake ID, thanks for making me laugh.

If you try to use some type of school ID, again thanks for making me laugh.

If you had your drivers license taken from you because of a DUI or something like that, I cannot take that piece of paper stating your name and your birth date. It may be state issued, but it's not a gov't made ID and it does not have a picture. Sorry get lost.

For awhile at the local farmer's market there was a stand that made id's for fun. They would put anything you want on there, it's for fun... It says on the back of those cards "This is NOT a government issued card"...So thanks for making me laugh. And why did you even bother getting a fake id of the state I live in? The farmer market fakes used a totally different layout and style, yeah...get the fuck out.

Beware of those tricky kids born in the right year but not the right day. I always make sure to double check that date, I was once one of those kids. I was born in December and for a whole year I was being served alcohol to those that didn't really look.

I once was threaten with "I should hit you over the head with this bottle!" I don't know how that help her need of an ID but it didn't as she was told to leave without even a chance to buy.

I carded someone and I knew the person on the ID, I went to school with her but I did not know the person standing in front of me. I asked her how Anne and her son were doing and she responded with "They are doing great, I went to see her last week" lol, wtf sorry get out.

The kids who think it's ghetto fabulous to buy cigs and blunts from a liquor store instead of the 7/11 that is only 2 stores down from us have a hard time being carded. They will slam their id's down on the counter as if they were going to win a hand at poker. Huff and puff as they go out to their cars to get their id. These kids won't be able to handle real life in my opinion. If acting like an asshole gets you what you want, you will only get what you deserve, maybe the stalest blunt in the box or a pack of cigs that are freshly squeezed.

Be kind or don't bother coming in, thank you.

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Do you sell fake weed?

Got asked if we sell fake weed twice today by two different kids buying blunts. Alright kiddies I'm old and don't know what this is, but sounds like something a liquor store wouldn't have, so I goggled it. Lol, it's packaged and sold as potpourri and these kids are smoking it and throwing up.
oh word, fake weed

It must of been on the news that started this rumor mill and has these kids and all their friends wanting to smoke this potpourri. There really is no bad publicity when it comes to this stuff. Look at Four Loco that energy/alcohol drink in a can, it was killing college girls and everyone wants it. It was soon band from the distributor so we up-ed the price to $4.99 a can instead of the usually $2.49 and we sold out of the 8 cases we had left within a day of the band. If it wasn't for all the news this stuff would of just been sitting around collecting dust.

Monday, April 11, 2011

Cell phone jammer is broken NOooOOOOooOOo

Or as the instruction manual says it's "in the bad", come on China I bought a fine product and it only last a few months. It took longer to ship then it took to break. It could have been my fault for leaving it at the store for fellow employees to use. I'm thinking someone dropped it on the floor, but no one said or would admit they did.

Could have been just cheaply made. Its battery wouldn't hold a charge after 2 weeks of use, we had to leave it plugged in all the time. Eh, still was worth the $25 I paid for fun and the peace and quite it gave.

I had 3 people in tonight just yapping away on their cells phones. First convo went something like from a big black guy with a big loud voice "He has Comcast, why would he change that? That's fucking stupid. Who would do that? He has Comcast, he wouldn't do that!!" I pushed the jammer's button, the little green light came on and he was still talking about how that guy has Comcast. Sometimes it can take time to cut someone off but this guy never got cut off. At the counter to the parking lot was nothing but "HE HAS COMCAST! WHY?!"

Second convo was from a short 30 something year old women on her bluetooth, "Well if she comes over tonight you can't go over there tomorrow. It's a school night honey" Then "EXCUSE ME! Where is your white zin?" Oh she was talking to me, she said, "excuse me" like I'm the one who is rude....then back to "No, I told you if she comes over tonight you can't go tomorrow!" Meanwhile I just point in which direction to go. I push the jammer button and then look at my phone; it drops 2 bars instead of 4. Well sonova, this sucks.

Third convo was from some lady who had nothing to say but "Uh huh", "hmmm", "tiisss and "hmmm". I do not and will not say "Thank you" or "Have a good one" to these cell phone people, but I do say the total very loud or ask CREDIT OR DEBIT? very loud, so that makes up for my lack of speech...in my opinion.

One problem with the jammer is that we can't leave it on all the time because it also jams cordless landline phones and 2 out of 3 phones we have are cordless. So it was always being turned off and on. I know when I would be in control of it I'd turn it on at least 8-10 times in a normal day. Maybe it's just dying from all the use it had within it's short life span.

Best Buy bathroom horror story

I know it's not my store but I was actually a customer at the time and I got bathroom horror on my mind so,

My friend and I were walking through the parking of our local Best Buy store, we passed some guy who was leaving and he said to us "Watch out for the shit in there!" For some reason I just assumed there was some loud mouth person in there throwing a fit, I was wrong.

Right there beyond the double automatic doors on their Best Buy blue and gray carpet was a turd. It must of just happened, there was a circle of employees standing there about 10 feet away just looking it. I walked around it as one daring employee placed a 'wet floor' sign near it. I heard someone yell "Get something to clean this up!" and then I saw a young boy running up there with a vacuum cleaner. The voice of who ever was in control said "NO! NOT A VACUUM! Get a dust pan..."

Geez, a vacuum cleaner

Saturday, April 9, 2011

Bathroom Horror Stories & Rant

"Do you have a bathroom?"

"Yes, straight back in the left corner"

"Thanks", "Thank you", "Hey blah blah it's in the corner!", "Oh", "Where?", or "I'll be right back" are the common responses. How some people use the bathroom isn't common...

The Good:

Anyone who is a normal human being. Knows how to knock if they believe someone might be in there. Uses the trash can for trash. Knows how to flush and clean up after themselves for any reason.

The Bad:

Turns the door knob to realize it's locked, they don't believe it could possibly be in use so they bang and rattle the door while most likely scaring the shit outta someone using the toilet. "Hold on!!" is yelled a lot.

Sometimes guys enter the single person bathroom in groups as big as 4 I've seen. I can only image some using the sink.

Parents who let their little kids use this bathroom alone. They cannot reach the paper towel holder and usually use toilet paper to dry their hands and then like to drop it on the floor or leave it in the sink.

Homeless people keep stealing our soap, after we pin pointed who it was and said something to them we haven't seen them since.

Our bathroom is ghetto and has a doorbell ringer as a light switch, we wrote the word "LIGHT" above and below it to help some people not to be scared to touch it, but there are always stupid people. "There isn't any light in the bathroom."
"It's the doorbell, it's the light switch, hit it."
"I don't see it, HELP ME!"
Helping a grown person find a light switch is pretty annoying. Usually younger girls will not ask where the light is, they well just get one of their friends to stand in front of the door with it cracked a little bit for light.

Good lordy, why is there so much toilet paper on the floor? WHY?

Unflushed toilet, oh you giving me work to do?, thanks

The Ugly:

A pretty busy day, someone was already in the bathroom when a black lady had come running into the store and asked where the bathroom was right away. She ran back to the corner to find the door was locked. She couldn't wait...she pulled down her pants and took a shit on the floor right between the bathroom door and the soda cooler. She ran out as fast as she had done her business.

A way too pale white man didn't understand the directions to the bathroom, instead he found his way to our wine temperature controlled room and threw-up on an open wooden box of wine. Our wine guy was pissed and rushed in there to assess the damage, unfortunately upon seeing the up-chuck caused his gag reflex to produce his own and ...well just created more of mess.

Usually a few Mexicans (not being racist just stereotyping) if they use toilet paper they will throw the shit covered paper into the trash can. I was explained to by someone that in some houses they have poor pluming and the paper will clog the drain, but this isn't your house and that is sick and it stinks.

People who some how get shit on the toilet seat. These people are either breaking the rules of gravity, or they have bad aim, or don't know how to sit on a toilet properly. There has even been surprise poop on the floor a few times.

Pee on the seat, I'm not shocked. In fact if I didn't see pee on the seat I wouldn't know where I was.

Blood on the seat, gee thanks.

Little boy said to his mom "I got gum on my hands." "Well son go wash it off." Gum doesn't WASH OFF you dumb cunt, but it does rub off, gum on the door knob, gum on the faucet knobs, gum on the toilet handle, gum all over the wall. Weeeeeee

Given our bathroom is ghetto and very small it does NOT have a baby changing station. Any mother or father who lays their child down on a liquor store bathroom floor, I don't care if you do use a blanket for the baby to lay on, people piss on that floor night and day. It's child abuse and you should be ashamed of yourself for putting a shit filled diaper into our little trash can to stink up the place.

A young lady who was dressed in her perfect business skirt suit, asked for 5 cases of Heineken, she bitched about the price and asked for a discount. She felt she was buying a lot and deserved a discount, she was snobby, like her shit didn't stink... but then all of sudden she asked for the bathroom and disappeared for 20 minutes...and it did stink. She didn't get a discount and she didn't ask for one after her 20 minute vacation.

Piss on the floor? Water from the sink? Toilet water? Who knows, who cares what those puddles are. Place a paper towel over it and wipe it with the bottom of your shoe.

Women who think tampons can be flushed.

The floating tampon. Yeah you couldn't flush it so you left there, thanks.

Women who think it's ok to leave a bloody tampon or pad uncovered right on top of the top can. I am thankful it made it to the trash can but com'on wrap it up in toilet paper or at least place a paper towel over it.

Once upon a time we had a girl that worked there that could fill the bathroom up with a rank fish smell.

Does driving the liquor store give you the shits? For real, please don't stink up the store, it can and has happen way too many times.

People who sneak a bottle of whatever alcohol into the bathroom. Drink the contents of bottle and then try to hide the bottle by flushing it. It's not going to work.

"The toilet is overflowing, it's not my fault!!" It probably isn't their fault, it's from the women who flush their tampons and the people who think the toilet is a trash can for paper towels and god knows what else. It's even worse if the person who witnesses the toilet overflowing not to tell someone, a few times the water has ran and ran until it reached 2 isles of the store and on it's way to the counter. Sometimes there are fun surprises floating around too...

LOCK the door behind you! If you don't someone will walk in on you and you'll ruin their day or yours.

CLOSE the door, yes close it all the way PLEASE!

The mystery stain on the wall, it won't even come off with bleach. Oh well, it gives people something to think about while they're in there.

An older women was talking to me, asking me about where something was and how great it was, all awhile she was taking a huge shit in her depends. It was very hard not to notice the sounds of a massive poo being made. I was just glad she didn't leave her diaper in our trash can.

Men who think it's ok to use the side of our building as a bathroom. We are located on a busy route and I'm sure not all of the South bound drivers like what they see.

Poop Socks have been found in our parking lot and on the side of the building. Just in case you don't know, poop socks are found when someone takes a massive poop outside and they really really wish they had toilet paper, so they sacrifice a sock to clean themselves and leave the poor sock behind.

Human poop has been found out front on a yellow parking space line where two cars where probably (hopefully) parked.

Monday, April 4, 2011

Flagged Pen!!

This guy is buying a 12-pack of beer, he pays with a credit card, as the credit card machine is thinking about approving this guy I put a pen down for him to use in about 5 seconds. He picks up the pen and taps it on the counter a bit and then asks "Do you have a bathroom?"

"Yes, in the corner, straight back."

Then he takes off for the bathroom with the pen in his hand... Meanwhile the credit card machine spits out his approval. There's 2 things wrong with this, why didn't he wait to finish his transactor and why the hell did he take my pen into the bathroom??

So he returns...the pen is still in his hand, he signs for this beer and leaves the pen on the counter. I claimed the pen was flagged and pushed it off the counter onto the floor, it landed behind our newsstand of free stuff to read.

The very next customer that came up, he was an older man who talked too loud. This guy sees the pen and says "Whoa free pen!" grabs it up and sticks it in his shirt pocket. Again there's 2 things wrong with this, he should of checked the pen to see if it wrote first...maybe or um...he should of asked if it was mine pen. Oh well, I hope he enjoyed his free pee pen.

Your receipt is your trash

It's well known that no one wants a store receipt for a six-pack beer, so our reggy's are set-up to not print a receipt unless we tell it to. I usually hit the print button for people who: complain about how much their total was, or if they spent anywhere close to $80ish and up, or anyone who says "Did you include my case discount?". My store receipt system really works well... but the receipts that are pissing me off are credit card receipts.

It is required that I give you a credit card receipt, it is NOT required that you leave it on the counter, or tell me to throw it away for you. Just fucking take the damn piece of paper and throw in the garage can out front by the door. It's really not hard to be responsible to protect your own identity. This little piece of paper you leave on my counter has the last 4 digits of your card, what type of card you have and your full name on it. I don't know how people go about stealing another's identity but I pretty sure you leaving that receipt behind well help them out a great deal.

It is not my job to tear up your unwanted half of your credit card receipt, the MOST I'll do is crumple it up and toss it at a trash can, or sometimes it'll fall off the counter where anyone can take it, or sometimes an angry clerk will pick it up and throw it at another clerk, who then throws it back and some how it'll end up on a shelf next to Jim Beam.

I find it rude when you ask me to throw it away for you, or just leave it on the counter, like you can't find a proper place for your own trash. Grow the fuck up, tear up your receipt and throw it in a trash can.