Friday, January 7, 2011

Funky Dunky gets the band

Oh it was joyful day when one of our most smelliest regulars got the band from our store. We called him funky dunky because he always smelled like b.o.  and worked at dunkin doughnuts, he would always be wearing his work clothes. I hope he worked in the back, his smell made me gag.

He would always buy a big can of budweiser and then something like a bottle of mad dog or a 4pk of wine coolers. I always assumed he must be buying for random teenagers. If we looked outside at his car, sure enough there would be some other car sitting next to his with some teens in it. oh well, that would a $500 fine for him, not us.

Well he got his beer and a 5th of bacardi grand melon that day. Just so happened that I was outside at the time. I watched him put the 5th on the hood of his car, then he opened his car door and sat his fat ass down. Gravity took over and the 5th rolled off the hood and broke on the ground. I looked at him and rushed back in.

He comes in and gets another bottle of bacardi  and says the bag broke and his bottle fell out. Damn did he hate me when I said what really happened and its not our fault he is so stupid. He was shocked we were going to give him a replacement bottle, he took the bacardi 5th that was on the counter and said "ooh ook I understand, I'll put this back then." I watched him on the camera as he walked back to the rum isle and stopped to put the 5th in his pants. I got to yell "I see you, put the bottle down and get out!"

He said "I'm sorry." and I said "You can't come back here anymore."

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